When you feel like a Failure

September 26, 2014 § Leave a comment

I have been trying this week to commit myself to writing more whether it is on my blog or in my prayer journal. I have written everyday since Tuesday. That’s not a lot but it’s more than it was over this summer.

A friend and his family gave Patrick and I a book, “Praying God’s Word” by Beth Moore. I wasn’t sure where to start in the book because it has several different chapters on different topics ranging from forgiveness to depression to guilt and loss. The book allows you to skip around and focus on your struggle. Moore gives some commentary at the beginning of each chapter and then gives you several scriptures turned into prayers that you can pray over yourself, family or friends. I have already been moved by this book. I have read maybe five pages but I have found scriptures/prayers that are exactly what I need for the moment. Below is an excerpt from the book that opened my eyes to my struggle of failure.

The question of authority is one we are challenges to answer every single day. The concept of rededicating our lives to Christ only at infrequent revivals or conferences can prove disappointing and defeating. Joshua 24:15 suggests a far more workable approach: “Choose this day whom you will serve” (emphasis Moore’s). Christ repeated the concept when He called us to take up our crosses daily and follow Him. Do you want to know something wonderful? A daily recommitment is not to ensure that we’ll never fail, but to help us develop the mentality that every single day is a new day. A new chance to follow Christ. Obedience to God is not some diet we suddenly blow. It is something to which we recommit every single day, no matter how we blew it the day before. Victorious living is not an instant arrival. It is the pursuit of one victorious day at a time until the sun sets on enough to begin forming victorious habits.  (pg. 152)

This paragraph has had me thinking a lot the last few days. I may not have a schedule of when I spend time writing or spending time with God, but I have made sure that I do it everyday. I might fail over the weekend on writing or spending time with God but I am thankful that every single day is a new day for me to try. I know I am not perfect at anything in this life but isn’t that just part of our life? I never make a meal perfect every time I make it. Sometimes I forget an ingredient so I improvise. Sometimes it turns out great and sometimes it tastes disgusting. I am just thankful there is a “next time” for making a meal or writing or spending time with God.

I hope you are encouraged today. I know I have been struggling and I have been lucky to have family and friends praying for me and being willing to listen when I need to talk. I want to leave with one of the prayers I have been praying this week. It’s from Psalm 21:1-2; 5. “O Lord, like David, help me to rejoice in Your strength and say of You, “How great is my joy in the victories You give!” Father, please grant me the desire of my heart to be free from this stronghold and do not withhold the request of my lips. Through the victories you give, may Christ’s glory be great!”

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Summer Update

September 23, 2014 § Leave a comment

I hate when I go long periods of time without writing. This summer was a crazy one for me. I traveled quite a bit at the beginning and then stayed busy with life happenings. Friends having babies, parties and squeezing time in with my husband. This was a fun summer though. I honestly can’t believe it’s the first day of Fall and that October starts in 8 days. If I blink my eyes too quickly it is going to be 2015.

Summer was super fun. I was honored to be a bridesmaid in my friend Abby’s wedding. It was on a farm in Illinois. Absolutely beautiful! Once I was back to LA it was time to celebrate my fifth wedding anniversary with Patrick. Somedays it is hard to believe we have been together for that long. I barely remember what it is like to not have him in my life though. I am so thankful for all his love and support. We got to spend two days at one of our favorite places on Earth; Disneyland!

Life carried on through the summer grilling out at least twice a week. I got to make an awesome birthday cake for our friend Andrew. It was a Mickey Mouse cake. I seriously love baking so it was a blast to make it for him! We also got to have our first experience at the Hollywood Bowl! We saw the amazingly talented John Williams in concert. He composed music for movies including but not limited to Indiana Jones, E.T., Jurassic Park and Star Wars. The LA Philharmnic played as Williams conducted. It was more fun than I could have imagined. We are definitely making a part of our summer LA traditions.

Now that Fall is here we are anticipating a couple different friends coming in for a visit and hopefully things to slow down at least for now. I hope everyone else had a fun summer! Fill the comments with your favorite Fall memory! My favorite Fall memory is raking leaves into piles and jumping into them then putting the leaves into the bags that look like jack-o-lanterns!

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